Monthly Archives: December 2011

Details That Make A Difference

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The difference between and ordinary event and an extraordinary event is in the details. From some of the most reliable sources around the world we have compiled a list of  the top 5 things not to forget on your special day! The most overlooked details are:

– Dont forget the bathrooms. Make sure the bathroom has some touches from the wedding; candles, flowers, monogrammed (disposable) hand towels would all be a nice touch.

-Make sure your photographer takes pictures of the ceremony and reception site while they are empty. These make beautiful photos for remembering how the event looked when you first got there.

– Check to see if your venue has enough waitstaff to handle the amount of guests. Nothing is worse than making your guests wait for a half hour to get a drink.

– Make sure centerpieces don’t interfere with conversation. The right height, width and style can make a difference in your guest’s ability to interact with one another.

– Emergency Kit – The best emergency kit will be comprehensive enough to handle everything from a broken bridesmaid zipper to a  sock-less groomsman.  Remember the Boy Scout motto and ‘always be prepared’. This kit should go to the maid of honor or best man and should be available at a moment’s notice!

Remember, a good wedding planner will keep you on course; whether it is a binder, a list or a certified wedding specialist. 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Ten Trends We Loved in 2011

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From luxury shoes to cultural influences, 2011 brought us some of the best trends in wedding and reception styles that we have seen in a long time. Many people this year have been booking their venues with Tradewinds Hotel. Brides and grooms channeling their own personal style, incorporating pop culture and following the advice of well-known wedding stylists have embraced these styles above all others.

1) Two Gowns. Having a gown for the wedding and a separate, less formal gown for the reception is not only acceptable, it has become extremely popular since Kate Middleton embraced this trend last  April.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2) Aisle Runners. Custom aisle runners have become the latest must-have. Available in an array of colors, monograms, styles, this is a trend that is going to explode in 2012.

 

 

3) Flash Mob. Having the entire wedding party take part in a choreographed but, seemingly impromptu dance is a big hit and makes a great wedding video.

 

4) Headbands.  Smooth, sleek, spectacular and sparkly, the headband was the headpiece of choice. The number one reason is that a great headband will look good with any hairstyle.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5) Going Green. Couples have taken note of environmental concerns and continue to place the future of our planet among their top priorities and are willing to pay more for green, eco-friendly products.

 

6) Culture. Couples are infusing their cultural heritage into the entire event from start to finish. Blending cultures, food, dance, music makes a warm welcome to all members of the family.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

7) Luxury. Couples are cutting back on non-essentials to spend more on luxury items. Figure out what is important to you and spend the money there, whether it is food, top shelf liquor from https://www.bullfrogwineandspirits.com, an exceptional cake, Bvlgari cufflinks or a couture gown – you will never regret treating yourself to something fabulous and tasteful.

 

 

 

 

8 )  Shoes. The bridal shoe has gone from ordinary to extraordinary, explaining why brides everywhere are so excited about their shoe; wearing color, over-the-top sparkly platforms and opting for fabulous designer shoes for their wedding.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9) Less is more. Classic Black & white photography,  monochromatic decor, engraved invitations. The classics never die and and ‘”Simple”  is a style statement that needs no explanation. You won’t see any leopard prints here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

10) Seating. One of the best trends in receptions is the ‘conversation area’.  Beautiful furniture to match your decor, arranged  in the bar area to give the appearance of a lounge. The benefits are endless; in addition to adding an element of style, you provide an area other than the table for guests to meet and mingle.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

What is Great Customer Service?

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Ask any bride or groom the most important part of selecting their wedding professionals and they whole-heartedly agree: Customer Service! The best product or service is only as good as the people who handle it from start to finish and the worst single thing that a business can do is to drop the ball when it comes to this (most) critical element.

So, without being vague, what makes a company’s customer service great? Attention to detail, follow-up, communication and the willingness to settle for nothing less than perfect.

I remember a  bride from many years ago who inspected her gown upon arrival and there was a giant fabric flaw directly in the front of the skirt. There it was, right in the middle, completely visible without a magnifying glass- a huge slub of silk!  She immediately asked the store manager to get another gown and was told this was not possible. She was then offered a discount of 20%. This did not sit well and she left the store in tears. Later that day she came in and spoke to me, I was working in the alterations department and she asked what I could do. I suggested that with the owner’s permission we could replace the front of the dress with an entirely new skirt panel of the same exact fabric. It would take several seamstresses many hours to complete this task and it was going to cost the store hundreds of dollars in materials and labor but, the owner decided it was worth it.   Melinda picked up her gown the day of her wedding and it was perfect, we completed the task to her satisfaction and were able to recoup some of the loss from the manufacturer due to their lack of quality control. She was thrilled, she referred us to dozens of her friends and the story had a beautiful ending. I think of Melinda often because of her calm resolve and her unwillingness to compromise quality for a 20% discount. Her words haunt me, “I am not unhappy about the price of the gown, I am unhappy about the quality. I have paid a fair price and I would like the product I ordered.”  The fault fabric was not of her doing so, why should she have to suffer? As wedding gown professionals it was our job to deliver that product, and as experts in customer service…. we did.

Remember:

-If the customer has needs you cannot fulfill, refer them to another professional. It is better to say no to a job too big than to make a promise you can’t deliver.

-Remind the customer that they do get what they pay for. Your company may not be the cheapest but, you’re worth it.

-If they have selected you from dozens of bakers, florists or DJ’s to handle their event, they deserve to be spoken to as soon as possible. Even if it is a call to tell them you are very busy and wont be able to handle a consultation at a later date, you need to manage your time well enough to handle every customer as if they were the last, or they might very well be just that.

Great customer service is putting your customer’s needs first,  identifying any problems, addressing them immediately and being accessible.  Great customer service is not just making promises but, keeping them.

 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Bridal Myths Busted ….. the truth comes out!

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For the almost thirty years I have been working in the wedding industry I have heard the same mistruths over and over. Most of the time I sit quietly and listen as people express their various opinions since I realize that I am probably never going to change their mind. Sometimes I try to convince them of the truth in a quiet voice knowing that an argument is inevitable when your become confrontational. Today, I would like to address a few “Bridal Urban Legends” and hopefully begin to dispel those rumors once and for all. 

Do you need to order your bridal/bridesmaid gowns early? TRUE!  Having worked in a bridal gown manufacturing facility I can explain to you the production process. The designer and manufacturer work from a schedule that is usually at least 6 months from the delivery date. The ‘cutter’ stacks up to 10 layers of the fabric, rolls the paper pattern over it and uses a sort of fabric  jigsaw to cut through all layers simultaneously then stacks the pieces for production. This is done for every size of that gown. The pieces are handled separately and sewn together in segments by different seamstresses to make each gown. So, depending upon the size of the company, there can be dozens of gowns  being produced at the same time. When a special order comes in, the production line is interrupted for that special order. Whether it is extra length, extra size or a rush order, the manufacturer has to cut, assemble and finish this one gown by itself which takes extra time, money and sets production back by a period of time. Ordering as early as 6 months before your wedding ensure you will fit into the production schedule and your gown will arrive in plenty of time.

The Bridal Salon makes tons of money on special orders. FALSE! The charges for rush orders and special sizes are imposed by the designers, not the salons. If this were true, salons would charge hundreds of dollars for these changes, not a standard percent. In reality it costs the salon extra to take these orders. Special orders require a lot more attention, phone calls, alterations, overnight shipping and TLC. If the salon is able to get a gown for you in 10 weeks even at an extra charge, they will be working twice as hard to make sure that gown arrives on time and in one piece.

You get better deals at a Trunk Show. TRUE! At a trunk show, the designer or an authorized representative will be on hand to help you. They know everything about the gown you are trying on and they are familiar with the production schedule  and the designer’s ability to make changes to that particular gown. In addition there are trunks how specials and incentives to buy. The best part is that they will have the opportunity to meet you and instead of an order number, you will become an actual person who they have a vested interest in pleasing.

Cats are hazardous to  your bridal veil. TRUE! I have seen this one first-hand.  When  I took my first bridal job ever I was trained to ask the brides as they were picking up their gowns “Do you have a cat?” If the answer was affirmative I then launched into my speech about how you must keep the gown and veil away from cats and better make sure you distract them with Blue Buffalo reviewed treats. I never questioned it, I just accepted it as the truth. Fast forward 10 years when I was helping a headpiece designer  pack his veils for a show. FYI – he had two cats. When we began to pack the veils, I was in total disbelief when I realized there were holes all over the veiling. Seriously? It seems that cat saliva dissolves veiling. Netting, illusion,tulle, whatever you call it… cat saliva will destroy it and cats love nothing more than to get their paws and jaws on a tantalizing veil. Keep your cats away from your gown and veil.

Salons order gowns big so they can make money on alterations. FALSE!  I saved the best for last. I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this and I can’t believe this one is still around. With Designers measurement charts posted clearly on the internet, after seeing hundreds of too-tight disasters, brides and bridesmaids are still repeating this as if it were true. Here is the absolute 100% truth that you can bank on: Part 1) Salons are obligated to measure and order the gown in the size determined by the manufacturer’s measurement chart. The measurements are not flattering or easy to stomach since an average size 8 woman will more than likely measure into a 12  bridal or bridesmaid. If the gown is too tight, there is a problem. If you sign off on a smaller size due to vanity or mistrust of the person measuring you and your gown comes in too small – you are looking to spend up to double the price of the gown to have it made bigger. If the gown comes in too big, you can have it taken in. Have your measurements taken by the salon and order the gown that the salon recommends based on which will fit the largest of  your bust, wait or hip measurement.  Part 2)Alterations is a big expense for the salon and rarely a money-maker. Somehow people over the years have this impression that the alteratins department has a profit margin akin to  Wall Street. The alterations department is the place where miracles happen but, it takes time and talent. Seamstresses work their fingers to the bone (literally), hand sewing and beading complicated gowns that take not just hours but sometimes several days to complete. They do not want to rip open a $7,000 gown but they can and they will if they have to. Your job is to be as calm as possible  so they can get their work done to absolute perfection.

Order your dress as early as you can, order the recommended size, keep your cats away from the gown and veil and you will have a glorious day!
Learn more at: https://www.htxcompany.com/

– Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Wedding Website Do’s and Dont’s

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Technology is a wonderful thing. Engaged couples can not only design their own unique website telling their story but, also share wedding news, photos, updates, blog about the details, etc. It is also a great way to alert guests of any last minute changes and to clue them in to pertinent information. Over 30% of today’s couple are using wedding websites to share information and that figure increases faster than Charlie Sheen can ‘tweet’.  However, there are some pitfalls to having access to this much information and  to having so much information about you available on the internet.

DO research on the site itself and how long it has been around. Free sites are available but are literally a dime a dozen. They can be loaded with  pop-ups. UGH! You don’t have this much time to waste on putting together a website only to have problems later. Use a reputable server to host your wedding webpage.

DO NOT list your gift registry information on your website. It is perfectly acceptable to provide a link to the website, but do not list gift preferences here. It is in poor taste.

DO put tons of photos on your website. Friends and family will love to see your photos as a couple, they tell a story. Of course they will want the official engagement photo but, the snapshots from vacation, from your childhood, with friends and family will also be a big hit.

DO NOT go on a 2 page rant about something wedding-related or it might come back to bite you. Maybe the florist was not as nice as she could have been, maybe the photographer put you on hold too long the last time you called or even worse, you and one of your guests got into a disagreement.  Its best not to blog about these things on your website. The internet is a really easy place to get yourself into hot water so keep those things to private conversations and emails. If you must blog, blog about the positive aspects of your engagement period (period). Keep the private stuff to yourself.

DO make it a family affair. Put your parents’ wedding photos, photos of the attendants, your sisters, brothers, and your beloved pets. It is all about getting to know your story.

DO NOT share  incriminating photos of drunken attendants at  bachelor/ bachelorette parties. These things are private and as much as you shouldn’t share them, no one really wants to see them. Everyone lets loose sometimes but this is not the place to expose wild antics. Unless you’re going for a ‘Brides Gone Wild’ theme.

DO make it your own. Be as unique as you want to and let your friends/family/guests see your individuality. Romantic, eccentric, conservative, whatever your personal style is – don’t be afraid to let it shine.

DON’T Allow comments without your approval. The last thing you need is someone making some kind of comment that ruins your day and has you scrambling to figure out how to delete. 

DO encourage your guests to comment. Reading words of encouragement is uplifting and can make your entire affair become more close-knit.

 Done properly, your wedding website will be memorable and bring you closer to your loved ones. Your guests will have an opportunity to get to know you better and get a glimpse into your relationship. Working on a website together is a great way to bond even closer to your betrothed and to  pay tribute to your parents and other special guests.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Promise Rings – A Closer Look

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A promise ring is a symbol of love and commitment made from one person to another during dating when the relationship turns more serious. Perhaps you are both in college and have no money or time for a wedding just yet but, you fully intend to make that commitment when you are ready. You want to make a stronger statement than mere ‘dating’ and a promise ring is just the thing to do that.  

When you give or accept a promise ring, you are promising to love the recipient forever and to be faithful. Commonly, a promise ring is given before engagement. It can symbolize sort of a trial period before engagement and the ring  is worn on the left hand until it is replaced by an engagement ring and then switched to the right hand.

Promise rings are not just for women. The popularity of promise rings for men has risen in popularity in recent years. If he gives you a promise ring, it would nice touch to give him one in return to cement your promise to him as well. ‘s meaning. After all, you both need to commit to the promise or it has no meaning. Get him something manly, perhaps in titanium.

Some promise rings have small diamonds, some have small gemstones but they don’t have to include a stone at all, some rings are simple bands with the promise engraved inside. In fact, there are many websites dedicated to romantic promise ring inscriptions, or you can choose your own sentiment.

 

My personal favorite is the Claddagh Ring. If worn on the left hand with the heart facing out, it signifies that you are spoken for. If worn with the heart facing in, people will assume you are already married. However, I doubt if the “Promise Ring” police will arrest you if you wear it either way. It is a traditional Irish band and many people have been known to use this in lieu of engagement ring or wedding band. It is highly sentimental, filled with Irish lore and has a variety of  romantic legends associated with it. I consider that to be quite special in itself.

Any way you look at it, the “promise ring’ is a sweet, sentimental gesture and one that should not be taken lightly.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

Engagement Ring Etiquette

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The most recent celebrity dispute over engagement ring ownership stems an old debate: “Who keeps the ring if the engagement is broken off?” Clearly Jesse James and Kat Von D were madly, desperately in love when he popped the question with a $50,ooo  Neil Lane engagement ring. Now, the wedding is off and apparently so are the gloves. He said she needs to return the ring, she said he cheated, he said it was intended for her to keep only if they got married, she said “No way!”  Much like  the Kardashian/ Humphries debacle (although the wedding clearly took place in the latter example) this is another example of bad judgement and bad manners. To Kim K’s credit, she has offered to buy back the $2 million ring from her husband of 2 months…. it turns out she made arrangements for this in the pre-nup.

Etiquette dictates  the rule as follows: If the man breaks off the engagement, the woman keeps the ring. If the woman stops short of the altar, the groom-NOT-to-be keeps the rock.  Size doesn’t matter, whether  it is a 20 carat ring or a diamond chip, the rules still apply. There is only one exception to this rule: family heirlooms. If  he hands you his grandmother’s ring (the one she wore while your grandfather was stationed overseas in WWII, anxiously awaiting his return so they could being their lives together) you are obligated by the laws of morality and kindness to give it back to him.

However, the legal system doesnt always agree with the rules of etiquette. There are a mutitude of cases where the courts have ruled in favor of one party or another, whether they were they were at fault or not. This begs the question, “Why would you want to keep a reminder of a soured relationship?” Because legally, acceptance of the ring represents a binding contract according to legal experts specializing in these type of pre-matrimonial disputes.  Another legal twist occurs when ring was given as a present for a birthday or Christmas. In this case the law in most states declare the ring to be a gift and treated as such.

For me, spending this kind of negative energy and paying lawyers to settle things is a waste of time. However, if I found myself in a relationship where the groom-to-be was  repeater cheater, abuser or basic jackass and it had to be ended (mid-engagement) … I would probably keep the ring and defend myself in court if need be, sans lawyer.

What do you think?

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

Bridal Gown Shopping Can Be FUN!!

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If you are one of the thousands of couples getting engaged this holiday season I have something to share with you:  For bridal salons across the U.S., the entire month of January is ‘Black Friday’. In fact, if you have even a hint that you might be getting engaged over the Holidays, it might be wise to book an appointment now because on December 26th you might be on hold for a while.

Before you arrive for your first appointment to try on bridal gowns it is wise to be prepared:

LOOK YOUR BEST– Do your hair and makeup – you might want to take a snapshot of the gown you bought. Cell phone cameras and  cameras seem to enhance skin flaws and dark circles. Look your best head to toe and you will feel better, after all you are trying on wedding gowns and the better you feel the better you will look.

UNDER THE GOWN – Wear your nicest undergarments,  heels (the height you plan to wear) and pantyhose if you like. Also if you feel like you might need some extra control, take some spanx with you.

SUPPORT GROUP -Your mom, sister, best friend or anyone who will offer support and a reality check but, don;t take too many people or their opinions may drown each other out. Take only the peope who have an opinion you trust. If someone asks to go and you dont want them to – tell them the bridal salon limits the number of people who can accompany you, its actually true in many cases.

FIRST TIME’S A CHARM – It is true that many bride’s fall in love with the first gown they try on. This happens when the bride has a clear vision and can verbalize her choice (including budget) to an experienced Bridal Consultant. Your consultant knows the store’s inventory and how each designer’s gowns are cut and priced. If you can get her to visualize your description – you are that much closer to success!

PICTURE THIS– Take photos of gowns you found in magazines or on  the internet. But, make sure the salon carries that designer. It is your responsibility to do a little homework and find salons that carry the gowns in the styles and price range that you like. Imagine going into a Mercedes dealship with pictures of Toyotas….

CHECK PLEASE– Bring whatever form of payment you will want to use because once you have found a gown that you love, it is time to stop shopping. Salons require a 1/2 deposit to order the gown and the balance is due upon arrival.  The deposit is usually based on the entire balance, including tax and extras (extra length, size or custom orders).  While you are at it, make sure you read the sales contract thoroughly so there are no surprises.

If you show up for your frst appointment fully prepared, you are more likely to have a successful and stress-free shopping experience – it can even be fun!!

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

Gift Giving Made Easy

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We have all heard the old adage that is it better to give than to receive and I know from experience that there is that one occasion where you can’t wait to give someone that most special gift. The one thing they have always wanted or the one thing that will brighten their day. It could be a small kitchen appliance that they really, really want or something as large a s a bundle of cash. When giving a wedding gift (or any gift) the most important thing to remember is that ‘presentation is everything’.

Don’t re-gift. If you received a serving platter that you don’t like and you can’t return, move on. Giving it to someone else is only acceptable if they have coveted it and you have agreed they can have it. In any case you still owe them a wedding gift. The worst gift horror stories involve monogrammed items or items with the original gift card enclosed. Take some time and put some thought into a gift.

Cash is King. If you prefer to give cash as a gift, it is frowned upon to hand someone a roll of bills rolled into a ball with a rubber band wrapped around them (unless you are my father-in-law). Buy a lovely card, go to the bank and get brand new, crisp money and put it in the envelope. Checks are okay, too but the most important thing is finding a card that expresses your sentiments.

No receipt.  The most beautiful thing you have ever seen in your life may not be beautiful to someone else so, always include the receipt. Either tape it to the gift or tape to the inside of the card to make sure that it wil not get lost. Stores now give a nice receipt with no numbers, so it can be returned discreetly. Not giving them a receipt indicates that you don’t care if they like it or that you are embarrassed that you didn’t pay retail. I was given a gift one time with no receipt and the tags cut off…. not cool.

Last but, not least:

Wrap it up. If you are one of those people who thinks a gift bag with some tissue crammed into it is a substitute for wrapping a gift, it’s time to take a course in gift wrapping.  No matter how cute it is, suitable ‘wrapping’  for taking a gift to a casual birthday gathering is not suitable for a wedding. Buy some  beautiful wrapping paper, a roll of scotch tape, some nice matching fabric ribbon and wrap the gift. Wrap the gift and tie a bow (a real bow) on the gift. Don’t forget a matching gift card or gift tag with a nice handwritten note. Because, if it truly is the thought that counts, put some thought into it.

 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

Cutler/Cavallari Wedding – It’s On!

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This week we found out that our very own Chicago Bears Quarterback, Jay Cutler, has rekindled his engagement to his former fiance, Kristin Cavallari. Of course the media has bombarded them with questions about the date and location (he lives in Chicago and her primary residence is L.A.). For me, the bigger question is, ‘Will she do another pre-wedding photo shoot?’ Because according to my calculations, this might just be the mother of all “it’s bad luck to see the bride in (any) wedding gown before the big day” stories.

If you are just catching up; Jay Cutler is the QB for the Chicago Bears. Kristin Cavallari is a reality/actress/socialite who recently appeared on “Dancing With The Stars”.  The two became engaged and the wedding date was set for last summer. In June, Ms Cavallari was photographed in several bridal gowns for a Life & Style photo shoot.  4 days later he ended their relationship and just this week it is reported that they reconciled and are once again engaged to be married. Was one of the gowns she wore in the photo shoot one that she had selected for her wedding? Maybe not.  But, this is still a very odd coincidence in my book.

So, how do you break a curse, if there is one? 

When you are handed a second chance at happiness, it’s time to do things differently. If I were Kristin or Jay I would keep my lips sealed tightly shut. Of course I would opt for a quiet Chicago wedding and stay far away from the spotlight. Particularly any photo shoots with bridal gowns or endorsing any wedding related products until after the wedding. I would turn this wedding into a family event and not invite the HD reality TV crews. I would not use this as a way to gain publicity or attention and spend this time focusing on the relationship. The last highly publicized ‘reality darling/professional athlete’ wedding was an EPIC disaster (as if the  Hindenberg landed on the Titanic just as it was about to sink). If they are really committed, they will focus on the relationship and forget about the publicity.

Maybe I’m just being overly skeptical or maybe it comes from being a Cubs fan but, the last thing you want on your wedding day is the slightest hint of a curse. Better safe than sorry….. and whatever you do DON’T invite Steve Bartman.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago