Tag Archives: bridesmaid drama

Hoping For The Best & Preparing For The Worst

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No one begins the wedding planning process worrying about every single detail that could go wrong. Correction, most people don’t plan this way, I’m sure that there are those rare exceptions.  At the risk of frightening potential brides and grooms, there are about a million things that can go wrong on any given day much less the day or week of your wedding. Being prepared for a disaster is different than planning for one or even expecting something bad to happen, being on top of every detail is not Obsessive-Compulsive, it is responsible and requires clear thinking and adult decision making.

A disaster is defined a  sudden event, such as an accident or a natural catastrophe, that causes great damage or loss of life.

Just so we are clear; a disaster is not when it rains on your wedding day, when the color of the napkins doesn’t exactly match the bridesmaid’s gowns or when you have a head cold the day before your wedding. These are minor inconveniences. Of course a sudden illness ( however short term or curable)  can be a disaster;   a burst appendix, or  chicken pox. A disaster can be a blizzard that closes airports and roads for travel, stranding  invited guests wherever they may be for days. A disaster can be the reception hall burning to the ground three days before your event.

Although there is no way to prepare for these sudden and completely inconceivable forces that could turn your life upside down at a moment’s notice, there is a way to make them less devastating.

Take care of your health – Without over-reacting, pay attention to any changes in your body. See your doctor and ask him or her to update your vaccines and if you have never had chicken pox, mumps, rubella or measles – get the necessary vaccine(s)  far in advance of your wedding date.  This also might be a good time to think about multivitamins. If you are taking any prescription medications, you must be diligent about dosage and watch for possible side effects.

Travel Plans – If you are having a destination wedding, are traveling any distance or expect out-of town guests, check weather reports in the area where the wedding is planned and if there are any severe weather alerts (blizzard, tornado, hurricane) begin to think about alternative plans.  Remind everyone who is traveling by air to book their flights well in advance, purchase the traveler’s insurance and pay the small amount extra to book a flight they can cancel or alter at a moment’s notice, it will pay for itself if needed.

Overall Insurance – Many companies offer wedding insurance; comprehensive insurance that covers the entire cost of the wedding in case of disaster or emergency. Be careful, though,  and make sure you use a reputable  and reliable carrier. Always read the fine print and make sure you are covered for specific situations indigenous to your area.

Without obsessing, without spending every waking minute worrying and driving everyone (including yourself) nuts –  simply remember the Boy Scout credo: Always be prepared.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

Bridesmaids – How Many Is Too Much?

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The average number of attendants has risen  from 3 to 6 since the year 2000. Six bridesmaids is a lot to manage. Statistically, you will probably have at least one who is married, one who is pregnant, one who is difficult, one who is struggling financially, and one who has issues. In addition to planning the wedding you will also have to keep a watchful eye on bridesmaid gown orders, shoes and  and at the very least be aware of when the gowns arrive, the fittings, etc. You will have to be sensitive to each of them and at certain times flexible so keep that in mind when it seems like a good idea to have 8 bridesmaids. Ask yourself, “Do I have the patience to handle this ( x 6)?”

Of course, you may feel like you have no choice. The groom has a sister or two, you have a sister or two, there are a couple of BF’s and all of a sudden you are up to 8 of your dearest and closest friends. At this point, you must simply prioritize. 

#1 – Appoint a very reliable maid of honor, a  ‘Bridesmaid Manager’ of sorts and keep the lines of communication open. The MOH should be able to oversee all of the scheduling, act as a buffer (between you and the difficult one, anyway)  and communicate with everyone so there are no misunderstandings. Without her, you will be drowning in drama. Have a heart to heart talk and tell her your expectations and remind her that you are counting on her to help things go smoothly. If she flinches, you need to pick someone else.

#2- See #1

 You can have a many or as few as you like. One per 50-60 guests is a good guideline but it is not a hard and fast rule. The record? Jill Stapleton of Ohio had 110 bridesmaids at her wedding in June 2010. To be fair, you should not have more attendants than guests.

You can have an uneven number of bridesmaids.

You don’t need to have a groomsman for every bridesmaid.

They don’t have to wear the same dress, or the same color, or the same anything anymore. It is whatever you want it to be!

No matter how many bridesmaids you choose, the end result should be a happy experience. In this case, less might just turn out to be more enjoyable…. for everyone. 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

How Many Bridesmaids?

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The average number of attendants has risen over the last few years from 3 to 6 since 2000. Six bridesmaids is a lot to manage. Statistically you will probably have at least one who is married, one who is pregnant, one who is difficult, one who is broke, and one who has issues. In addition to planning the wedding you will also have to keep a watchful eye on bridesmaid gown orders, shoes and  and at the very least be aware of the fittings, etc when the gowns arrive. You will have to be sensitive to each of them and at certain times flexible so keep that in mind when it seems like a good idea to have 8 bridesmaids. Ask yourself, “Do I have the patience to handle this?”

The most important thing you can do if you are having several attendants is to have a very reliable maid of honor. She will need to oversee all of the scheduling and act as a buffer between you and the difficult one, anyway. Without her, you will be drowning in drama. Have a heart to heart talk and tell her that you need her to keep things in check, remind her that you are counting on her to help things go smoothly. If she flinches, you need to pick someone else.

Myth: You can’t have an odd number of bridesmaids.

Fact: You can have any odd or even number including the (unlucky) 13.

Myth: There has to be an usher for every bridesmaid

Fact: Grown women are perfectly capable of walking up and down the aisle solo. In fact you can have one usher escort two bridesmaids if necessary.

Myth: There should be  one bridesmaid for every 50-60 guests.

Fact: You can have a many or as few as you like. The record? Jill Stapleton of Ohio had 110 bridesmaids at her wedding in June 2010. To be fair, you should not have more attendants than guests.

No matter how many bridesmaids you choose, make sure they are all on board with the planning, the spending and the entire affair. The last thing you need is to be worrying about everyone else’s problems.

 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Our (Lack of) Wedding Party : wedding bridesmaid groomsman tallahassee Vintage034 vintage034