Tag Archives: Formal invitations

Spice Up Your Invitations!

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Wedding invitations have evolved into something so personal and unique that you can actually get a feel for the wedding itself just by seeing (and touching) the invitation. Whether you choose parchment, custom engraving or print the invitations yourself, there are dozens of things you can do to spice up your invitations without breaking the bank.

Photos – Consider incorporating your engagement photo into the invitation or save the date to make an impact.

Words – Using your own words, maybe some sort of prose, will add an artistic flair.

Be Creative – Use touches of your culture with color and font.

Sparkle – A little sparkle never hurt anyone, right? A touch of glitter, a rhinestone or iridescent ink is very exciting.

DO NOT  add confetti – no one likes opening an envelope with confetti in it.

Consider calligraphy instead of printed address labels, it really makes an impact.

Postage – Using a stamp with a specific theme is a nice idea. Take it a step further by using  custom photo stamps for all of your wedding postage. Also making sure you have the correct postage will save a ton of headaches. Can you  imagine having 150 invitations returned?

The most important thing to keep in mind when selecting your wedding invitations is that you don’t forget your personal style. Keep the event and location in mind and let that dictate the style of the paper, ink, font and wording.  With literally hundreds of choices, it can get very confusing but, don’t despair – there is a style out there just right for you. 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

 

Invitation Etiquette – Mistakes, Mishaps and Missteps

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Life is complicated. Weddings are even more complicated and proper etiquette is really, really complicated. Actually it’s not, it is really just common sense and it is not intended to make you feel better than other people, it is supposed to make other people feel comfortable with you. The most common etiquette mistakes are made with written correspondence.

When you begin to work your invitations, there are some fairly easy to remember tips:

-Save the Date cards, once reserved for only wealthy and important people, are almost standard fare these days. They should be sent 4 to 6 months prior to the wedding and only sent to people who will be invited to the wedding. Your wedding website ( if you have one) can and should be listed on the Save the Date.

-Never list any gift registries on your invitation. Save that for personal correspondences and your website. This is where a website comes in very handy for sharing information!

-Do not invite anyone to a pre-wedding event that you will not invite to the wedding. You can’t expect someone to come to your shower and give you a present if you’re not planning to invite them to the wedding. It would seem like they were good enough to give you a shower gift but not good enough to celebrate with you on the big day. The shower is meant to be a party for the women closest to the bride (and often her mom and the groom’s mom too). All these close female friends and relatives should also be invited to the wedding.

-Invitations with reply cards still need to have “RSVP” printed on them. This is just to remind them and it is a common courtesy. Many won’t send it back and someone will have to be delegated to make phone calls two weeks before the wedding to check on them. It’s a pain – but, there is one in every bunch… just be polite.

-Always add the right postage!!! Check and double check.

– It is not in bad manners to say ‘no children’ on the invitation. It would actually be bad to NOT mention it. Spell it out clearly and leave nothing to the imagination.

-Invitations should be sent out 6-8 weeks before the wedding. The RSVP date should be 2 weeks before the wedding date.

– Thank You cards should match the invitations and should be sent out as soon as you return from the honeymoon.

Invitation wording is trickier than ever; with blended families, multi-cultural parents, same-sex parents, all kinds of different combinations, it is hard to know where to draw the line. Your invitation specialist  should be able to help you with grammar, spelling and protocol. If you choose to DIY on the invitations, consult an etiquette handbook of some sort to walk you through the proper phraseology, you will not be sorry.

It’s a tough world out there, folks and etiquette makes it bearable for those of us who don’t answer the phone during dinner, who let old ladies sit on public transportation, who hold doors open for someone carrying a large package. It makes them feel more comfortable  and that’s the way it should be.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

The Scoop: Wedding Invitations

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With all the ever-changing trends in wedding  attire, lighting, color and decor, the one thing that has hardly changed at all is the invitation. Actual written invitations became popular to the masses shortly after World War II when rapid industrial growth gave the common person the ability to mimic the lifestyle of society’s elite. Until that time, only the super wealthy could afford beautifully printed stationery items. Now, brides and grooms can go so far as to even print their own wedding invitations, thank you, reply cards and other inserts at home. Of course I always strongly advise against doing anything yourself when it comes to something as important as your wedding. For one thing, the smallest mistake can ruin the entire project but, mostly because couples have enough to worry about without the added stress of a DIY project gone wrong.

For picture perfect ( and stress-free) wedding invitations:
Find something that expresses your personality and/or the theme of the wedding. Ultra-formal, casual, flashy or artsy… finding the right design is not as easy as it sounds. Spend plenty of time picking out  invitations that reflect  your personalities and give the guest a hint of what to expect at your affair.

Save The Date.  This is what gives them the first clue to your wedding style. It does not have to be the same exact style as the invitation but it should have a similar feel.

Inserts. Make sure that each invitation has a reply card with pre-paid postage. If you desire, you can also add a map, itinerary and some  include an insert that has neighboring hotels and other points of interest for out of town guests.

Thank You(s).Don’t forget to order Thank You Notes to match the invitations. This is the one detail that is often overlooked… hard to believe.

Quantity. Always order extra invitations and additional envelopes on top of that. The rule is to divide total number of guests by 2 and then add 25. But, this formula will not work for everyone. A good cushion is to have 10 additional invitations in case there is a last minute change.

Font. Don’t let anyone tell you that most fonts all look the same. Monotype Corsiva is way different than French Script. If you are in doubt, defer to the expertise of your invitation specialist.

Postage. Never rely on chance. Take the invitation to the post office, have it weighed and measured with all inserts in place. When you drop them off, make sure you ask how to make sure they are hand stamped. Irregular sizes like square envelopes always require more postage. Determining the postage is especially important if you decide on boxed invitations. Boxed invitations are small packages and will be weighed and measured differently than letters.

Stamps. You can order stamps online using your own photos or you can use an attractive stamp from the post office. Seasonal stamps are nice, especially the ones that have some sentimental meaning to you.

Calligraphy. Sometimes thought of as a lost art, calligraphy is something that cannot be mimicked by any computer program and is without a doubt, the most elegant form of addressing your guests’s envelopes.

Double-check. Double check for misspelled names, typos, grammar and syntax. Wording can be tricky (especially with blended families) so, ask for help with wording if  you need it and get a second opinion even if you think you don’t need one

The invitation is the first and last impression your guests will have of your wedding… make it as unique and special as you are!

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Reply Card Roulette

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 Unlike some future grooms, my husband helped with a lot of the wedding planning. He picked the menu, the cake, the venue and he singelhandedly documented receipt of the reply cards. Every day he hurried to he mailbox to collect the replies and took great delight in making the necessary notations on the master list. I could tell when the cards began to dwindle because he started to walk a little slower to the mailbox. For us, the reply cards were an exhilarating experience, and eventually an exhausting one, since not everyone replied in a timely manner, replied appropriately or replied at all. Believe it or not, the reply card is fraught with  places for guests to make errors and faux pas and for some reason, this is where guests make the majority of blunders. Your part is simple: You address the invitation to the person(s) you are inviting and make sure that you have a place on the reply card for the number of invited guests. So, what do you do when it all goes awry despite your best plans and intentions?

-When you sent a reply card that is obviously intended for the invited guest +1 and the invited guest returns the card, adding +2 or more without having previously discussed this with you, including adding their own children without your approval or acceptance of the idea, it is time to pick up the phone. Simply tell the guest that their invitation is intended for them and one guest only and leave it at that. There are exceptions but, those exceptions are totally up to you. What if they show up with the +2 or more, anyway…? You have to be prepared how to handle this, just in case.

-When you have received no reply card and it’s one week before the wedding? Time to pick up the phone and make a call to this guest and ask if they will be attending. Be specific about the reason you are calling; so you can ensure all of your guests have a place to sit and a proper meal.

As for those who reply, “YES” and then don’t show, there must be a very good reason. Of course you don’t expect  someone with a serious illness or broken leg to jump out of a hospital bed to attend your wedding but, wait until after the wedding to then call and see if they are doing better. Don’t wait for them to call you, they won’t.  They will probably feel you are too busy to talk and will wait for action on your part. This is not a snub or lack of concern, and this is one of those tiny little things that can ruin a lifelong friendship. Pick up the phone, call and see what happened. You are the only person who can decide if their reason for being a no-show was adequate.

-What if the reply is “NO” and they show up anyway? This is tricky. Speak to someone at the venue and see if there is a place they can be seated (there is usually some wiggle room) Of course they won’t have an assigned table or a place card or a favor but, they will be able to sit and that is all that matters. If there really is no room, you will have to be the one to deliver the news as gently as possible. I know firsthand how difficult this can be, I actually had a couple show up after having replied “NO” and there were no additional seats available anywhere in the room. Our solution was to ask them to sit at the bar and we paid  ‘a la carte’ for two additional meals. Tricky but not unmanageable.

There may be no single solution that works for everyone but, planning ahead will avoid hurt feelings and possible blowups. Consider posting information regarding seating on your wedding website if you have one, emailing people who you think may be having trouble with the reply card concept and possibly having specific instructions printed on the reply card. Some couples have resorted to adding “We have reserved ___ seats for you”  (or similar text) to the reply card. In my opinion, keep it simple and limit the possiblities of error. Although going above and beyond is a nice gesture,  I doubt if some people will even notice.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

The Most Common Wedding Etiquette Mistakes

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The purpose of good manners is to make other people feel comfortable. For centuries, manners have been dictated by society’s standards of conduct and this has worked out pretty well. Unfortunately some people never got the memo. In order for your wedding guests to feel comfortable, try to avoid these ‘most common etiquette mistakes’.

 1) Watch – I know that being late to your own wedding may seem inconceivable but, sometimes outside forces take over and you can’t control them. However, there should always be a plan in place to avoid being late. If something unforeseen occurs, make sure you are in contact with someone at the ceremony site to make an announcement at the time the wedding is supposed to start and give updates until you arrive. Being late for no other reason than you can’t keep track of time is rude in any situation, especially your wedding.

2) Save the Date – Sending someone a “Save the Date” card means they are also invited to the wedding. Both lists should be in sync. If you make a mistake and send someone a Save the Date and do not invite them, call them once you find out you have erred and apologize. If you send them an invite but had somehow omitted them from the Save the Date list, a call would be nice. In reality, Save the Date cards are a relatively recent custom so there is nothing that says you have to send them. Although nice, they are  not completely necessary so dont fret if you choose not to send them.

3) Invitations – Send the invitations 6- 8 weeks before the wedding. Sending the invitation two weeks before the wedding is rude and it makes the guest think they were an afterthought. If the invitation you sent came back to you for any reason, call the invited guest and explain to them what happened.

4) Church – Having a boombox instead of live music (strings or organist) is a huge mistake. This small expense will ‘class up’ your affair by leaps and bounds. Having boxed music at the ceremony seems a bit tacky, no?

5) Thanks – Sending Thank You Notes in a timely manner shows that you care. It shows that you are aware of your guest’s gift and you appreciate it. Waiting for nearly a year (or more)  to send out a Thank You Note is completely inconsiderate.

6) Gifts – Never list where you are registered in the invitation. You can put this information on your website if you have one but listing on the invitations is like saying “Come to my wedding and bring a gift.”

7) Flow – Make sure you have a qualified, trained and experienced DJ to keep things running smoothly during the reception. The last thing you need is to have  people introduced incorrectly or, even worse, not at all. The DJ  should have a script to work from and be well-versed on your specific wedding customs as well. A great DJ will almost certainly ensure a great reception.

The best thing you can do for yourself and your guests is to ‘forecast’ problems and plan ahead. A good wedding planner and a checklist will help. If all else fails, pick up the phone and ask for help… or forgiveness, whichever you feel is in order.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

 

 

“You are cordially invited” – Stationery made simple

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If the eyes truly are the window to one’s soul, your invitations are a window to what guests can expect at your wedding. Traditional or modern, conservative or funky, there is an invitation style for everyone. The question is: With so many choices, how does one find the right style for their nuptials?  Here are some easy steps to help you decide on your invitations.

 Do you have a specific style to your wedding? Formal, ultra-formal, casual or somewhere in between; find a style of invitation that suits the occasion. Your paper professional should be able to help you through this process, guiding you as to any specific rules governing each style.

Is there a theme to the decor of the wedding? Whether you have decided on a grand technicolor  scheme or if you opted on black and white everywhere, you’ll want to include that into the design of the invitation. Don’t be afraid to incorporate your colors and style  into your stationery choices and try not to be overwhelmed by all of the extras. Ribbon-ties, calligraphy, engraved, photographs… and the list goes on.  Take a deep  breath and keep your venue, color selection and your personal style in mind.

Budget is also a consideration so make sure you have all your needs in place before you decide on a particular invitation so you don’t get caught without some of the essentials. Save-the-date cards, Invitations, programs, inserts, placecards, table markers, guest book and thank you notes are all part of this important package.

If your wedding has some unique elements and you are not sure how to handle the wording, always consult your invitation specialist. Don’t forget to proofread everything before you put it in the mail and check with the post office to make sure you have proper postage on the envelope. You don’t want 150 invitations coming back to you because a square envelope ( no matter how small) requires extra postage.

According to all  planning resources, your wedding invitations should be in the mail no less than 6 weeks before the event.  Save the date cards are a whopping 6- 8 months in advance. This means it is never too soon to make plans to attend a Bridal Expo in your area.   Visit www.bridalshowexpo.com  for links to our vendors and to get four complimentary tickets so you can find an invitation specialist near you.

– Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago