Tag Archives: Wedding planning tips

Getting Dressed On Your Wedding Day

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You have probably been able to get dressed all by yourself since you were about 6 years old. Maybe back then you had a little trouble with the shoe laces but, other than that, getting dressed has pretty much been a solo act for the remainder of your life… then comes your wedding day.

Not so long ago, brides, grooms and the wedding party ( including parents) got dressed at their individual homes,  with the photographer snapping pictures throughout  the process to show the transformation for regular citizen to bride (or groom). I’m sure this  still takes place. However,one of the best decisions you can make  is  arrangements to prepare for your wedding on site. Why? I’m glad you asked!

Three compelling reasons to get dressed at the venue and not at home:

#1) Weather. Weather can be your worst nightmare for three reasons: Cold, rain and humidity. In cold temperatures, you will have to purchase something fashionable and attractive to go over the gown so you don’t freeze to death on the way there. Rain will mess up not only your gown but, also your hair, makeup and any chance you have for looking your best. Remember last weekend when buckets of rain were pouring down from the sky? Humidity can frizz or flatten, expand or squash … almost every hair type falls prey to humidity. It will also cause your gown to wrinkle easily since there is more moisture in the air.

#2) Wrinkles. Speaking of wrinkles, the men will get wrinkled pants from sitting, the bridesmaids gowns will most likely need to be re-steamed and any silk bridal gown will be a wrinkled mess after traveling even a short distance after being seated in a vehicle… even for a short time.

#3) Time– Getting ready at home provides you with a false sense of time; you are never in a hurry until you realize you are late. Getting ready at the church or ceremony site will keep you mindful that the clock is ticking.

Instead of worrying about these inconveniences, plan on getting dressed at the place where the ceremony will occur.

-Make arrangements in advance for a dressing area that is spacious and  have refreshments on hand.

-Have your hair and makeup done prior to getting dressed.

– Allow extra time for conditions like humidity which may require additional products for your hair and makeup.

-Rent, borrow or buy a steamer  to do touch ups on gowns and tuxedos. An iron will work on some fabrics but gowns with pickup skirts and layers of tulle will need to be steamed.

– Hire or appoint someone as your dresser. If your bridal salon offers this service, it is well worth it. They can steam, button, zip, fluff, adjust and inspect the bridal party so that everyone walks down the aisle perfectly coiffed and put together.

You will never regret the decision to get dressed at the site where things will take place. You will have more room, less distractions, and an added bonus is that the photographer can capture images of both male and female members preparing for the wedding simultaneously.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

Kids and Weddings – Yes or No?

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The best part about your wedding is having everyone you love in one place at one time. Aunts, uncles, cousins, best friends and (may times) their significant others. People with whom you have shared experiences, and looking forward to adding this to your list of fond memories. Then, the subject of kids comes up. The subject of children at weddings is a buzzkill for almost everyone …with or without children.

People with children don’t understand why you don’t want their little darlings around, why they have to exclude their children (part of the family) from a family gathering. They do not always want to leave their children out of the celebration and if there is travel involved, how long do they have to make arrangements for their children’s well-being? They consider it a huge inconvenience and some parents will be resentful.

But, some people with children don’t always want to travel with them or take them to a fancy event. They would like to have a night out without worrying about who ate their vegetables and making sure someone uses the right spoon. No highchairs, no temper tantrums, no whining…just a night out with your spouse and a glass (or two) of chardonnay.

People without children would often prefer you leave them at home, find a sitter and be done with it. They haven’t bonded with children, they don’t need or want the worry of children ruining their event with bad behavior,  out of control, touching things that don’t need to be touched. They are not as enamored with your children as you are.

Buzzkill.

Points to consider:

Kids are fun. they dance and laugh and eat cake. They will be all dressed up and probably not eat too much, anyway.

If you are paying $100 per person for dinner, how can you justify spending this much one someone who would probably rather eat McNuggets?

Kids are noisy – what if they can’t keep quiet during the ceremony?

Kids are messy. They will probably have filthy hands and want to touch the wedding gown or other things that don’t need to  be touched.

There is also the age thing: What is the cut off? There is a big difference between a 17 yr old and a 4 yr old.

The simple fact is that if you don’t want children at your wedding, state it on the invitation and make sure you are prepared for the fallout. If you are allowing children at your wedding, state it on the invitation and be prepared for the fallout. Either way you are not going to make everyone happy.

Make your decision (as a couple) and move on, you have nothing to explain and no explaining will make a difference, anway. It is your wedding.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

Paying It Forward – Wedding Style

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If you’re like me, the day after a large gathering at your home there is always tons of leftovers and things that are going to potentially go to waste. If there is that much extra just at my house, imagine how much goes to waste after every wedding, at every venue, every single time. I think about those things.

I know I am not alone, especially since there are the David Rothsteins of the world who have the ability to take action… and do just that. David, of the award-winning David Rothstein Music began a program to honor his grandparents called “Share Your Love” and since April 2008 has donated over 4,000 floral arrangements to local nursing homes, post-wedding. The story is inspiring and amusing, it’s worth the read. https://drsmusic.com/sharelove.html

However, you don’t have to be an industry insider or a renowned music professional in Chicago to take part in this recycling extravaganza. Here’s how you can do something good and ‘share the love’ yourself:

First, this is not something the bride and groom could or should physically handle. Appoint a wedding ambassador to handle this. Utilize  an event planner, maid of honor, best man or whomever is the most reliable and capable of handling this this task. You can make the arrangements pre-wedding and then sleep better knowing you have given something extra life by donating.

Flowers certainly lift everyone’s spirits, so make arrangements with a nursing home near your venue to either have your flowers dropped off or they may have someone who can pick them up, post-wedding.

Food products can be donated through local food banks or through ‘Feeding America’. If you have a catered affair and the catering company presents you with trays of leftover food, whatever reclamation program you decide will be delighted ! Again, make the arrangements ahead of time and donate whatever you can.  www.feedingamerica.org

Donating Bridal Gowns and bridesmaid dresses is extremely generous and a great way to  give. Gowns can be donated to a variety of organizations which can be seen at https://www.donatemyweddingdress.org/ . If your gown is stained, ripped or damaged you can make other arrangements through  the Mary Madeline project which uses the fabric to make burial garments for stillborn infants. https://marymadelineproject.org .

Whether you choose to focus on donating one item or go all out and give everything you can part with to charity, the feeling of paying it forward is overwhelming. Remember to make all of your arrangements pre-wedding since post-wedding you will be busy writing thank you cards and settling in to your new life and the importance of giving may take a backseat to your daily tasks.

 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Sponsored Weddings – Tacky or Tasteful

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From ads on craigslist and eBay begging for sponsors to “C” list celebrities and reality stars getting gratis goods or  magazines paying millions for exclusive photos , sponsored weddings have become not-so-tacky as they once seemed when Star Jones got married in 2004. For those of you who don’t remember Star Jones ( insert ironic joke here), her motive was as follows: in exchange for extolling the virtues of  all of the freebie vendors by name in public at every turn of the conversation and tons of high-profile referrals, Ms. Jones was given the’ Star’ treatment  at  little or no cost. Being a co-host on a highly rated daytime talk show, her salary was beyond what most Americans make in a decade but she opted for the freebie route instead of paying… and a trend was born.

In all fairness celebrities have been getting freebies since there were celebrities. Interesting since those who can afford it the most generally wind up paying the least. Kim Kardashian’s wedding  put Star Jones to shame in terms of cost, viewership and donated goods. In all fairness, the reality star televised event was profitable for every single  sponsor, especially Kim Kardashian (to the tune of millions)….unless of course you are talking about the ‘happily ever after’ part.

For the average bride or groom, the chances of getting that kind of coverage for your wedding is out of the question. For some people it is unthinkable to even speak of having ‘sponsors’ and the idea of asking for anything free is just, well….. tacky (just ask Barbara Walters). However, if you have all the right ingredients and are willing to swallow just a tiny amount of pride, you can get a lot of freebies. There are hundreds of websites offering tips and ideas on how to go about getting sponsors, some veterans even selling their plan in e-book form.

According to Andrea Hermitt of Yahoo.com, there are several tips to get sponsors for your wedding, including:

1. Make a list of everything you will need for your wedding.

2. Plan your wedding well in advance, making sure you have plenty of time to devote to this task.

3. Make plans for a unique wedding that will turn heads.

4. Make your wedding list large (larger weddings are more likely to be sponsored).

5. Create a spectacular wedding website and make it really active to show that you have connections. The knot.com has great templates for wedding websites.

6. Get everything in writing. The last thing you want is a 50 ft banner across the aisle that announces “This wedding is brought to you by Dr.Pepper”. Interestingly enough, most ‘sponsors’ require name placement in the invitation itself. This is tricky and potentially a deal – breaker. Make sure you know what you are agreeing to before you sign on the dotted line .

7. Look for prospective sponsors who are new to the business.

8. Have something valuable to trade with them. Consider your occupation, and what you can trade personally.
 
9. Youtube it! Make a creative video, perhaps a flash mob surrounding your engagement using product placement. Perhaps a commercial parody using your wedding details. Put it on youtube and share it in Facebook.
 
10. Consider making a donation to a charity in sponsor’s names.
The bottom line when looking for sponsors is incentives. What can you offer them that will equal the value of their goods/services? How can you bring customers to their business in a positive way? Some call it sponsors, but essentially it is bartering.
 
Whether you are paying full price or getting everything for free, make sure to check out each business you are dealing with; either by referrals, the BBB or whatever resource you generally use because unfortunately,you get what you pay for. 
 
-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Weddings That WOW!

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There is a lot of talk lately about personal touches for your wedding,  the way you bring together the style and theme to express your personality. Some people use color, others use  flowers, food, signature cocktail, interesting videography, wild place cards, guest books, etc. There are literally thousands  combinations and choices to make your event stand out and be noticed. In the end, the best way to show your guests that you have planned an event made for you and no one else is to use your imagination and break some rules.

Invitations: The invitation is one of the most important parts of the entire event. It gives information, shows color and gives insight into what type of affair you are having (formal, casual, etc). Oddly enough, making sure the font on the invitations, place cards, programs and all written material is all the same will have an impact. If you use several different fonts, do the same! Also with invitations, think about the look of the venue, the color of the flowers, the style of your centerpieces… all of those things can be expressed with a colorful, imaginative invitation that compliment the reception in every way.

Matching Everything: is a No-No. It makes the event look too cookie-cutter and typical. For a more memorable effect, use shades of the same color in an ombre fashion or choose complimentary colors of completely different families.

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Holidays: A great excuse to tailor your theme to a beloved family gathering. Be careful of giving in to the ‘been there, done that’ details and use your imagination. Consider purple for Halloween instead of the traditional orange and black, or white for a Christmas wedding in lieu of poinsettias and greenery.

 

 

 

In the end, it s every small detail added up that will give your event that finished look. The tiniest table adornment that mirrors something they have already seen expressed somewhere else in your decor will truly create a lasting impression, even if it is subliminal… it’s there. Remember, there is a very fine line between OCD and attention to detail!

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Finding the Right Fragrance For You

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Finding the perfect scent can be  overwhelming considering the thousands of fragrances available. Many women just stick to what they know and wear the same fragrance for  years. If it is a scent that you truly love, it is understandable… but, if you are thinking about starting fresh, your wedding day is the perfect day to break out a new scent! 

Tips for finding the right scent :

Never try on more than one scent at a time, it is a guaranteed headache for you and everyone around you.

Talk with the fragrance expert behind the counter. Their knowledge may surprise you and come in very handy.

Use your nose, not your mind. The name of a scent may not sound like something you want to wear and may be exactly what you like.

Wear a scent for 24 hours before deciding if you like it. It may start out okay but, then react with your body chemistry in a negative manner.

An additional tip for your wedding (specifically) is to take into consideration the fragrance of the floral arrangements. You never want to clash with your flowers.

After you have chosen the perect scent, remember to us it sparingly. The rule is that people should only be able to smell your fragrance if they are  close enough to hug you, anything more than that and you have gone too far.

Dousing yourself in perfume is no only a major etiquette faux pas, it can make people very sick.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

The Big Splurge – Is It Worth it?

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Everybody is guilty of “Monday Morning Quarterbacking” from time to time. What you should have said to someone, what you should have worn, something as simple as what you should have eaten for lunch. With weddings, there is a lot of this since it is a big event in your life and looking back, there are many things that brides and grooms would do differently. So when it comes to a big splurge, ask your self this “Is it  worth it?”

Worth It

Hair and makeup –  Hands down, brides agree this is one area where they are pleased to have spent a few extra dollars.

Music – Adding 2 extra pieces to an orchestra or band can make a noticeable difference, or if you choose a DJ, make sure to hire a professional. Music is the pulse of the event.

Wedding Planner – Even if you go with the simplest service and just hire a ‘day of’ planner, you will be happy that (for once) someone else is worrying about all the details and not you.

Food – Paying a little extra ‘per plate’ to get better food is a no-brainer. Great food = happy guests, happy guests=worth it.

Photo/Video – No one ever says they got too many pictures at their wedding, or the pictures were too good.  Plus a great video will provide you with years of entertainment and happiness.

 

Not Worth It

Extra Appetizers – Too much food during the cocktail hour will result in the guests not eating the delightful dinner that lies ahead. Keep it to a minimum.

Extravagant Favors – One area where the extra money does not pay off. Many people will leave the favors and then, what are you going to do with all the extras? Most couples suggest something simple and thoughtful or nothing at all.

Extras – Adding toiletries in the bathroom to match your wedding colors, extravagant place cards, really pricey garter or other non-essentials. You will never reap the rewards from these odds and ends. Again, make an impact with the things that are the most meaningful.

 

Of course, these are just opinions from past brides and grooms. Maybe favors are your big splurge and you have decided that it is worth it. If it is, do it right and make sure it is done in a way that will leave you with nothing to regret Monday morning except an empty bank account.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

Men’s Suits – The Big Debate

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As the 2012 Presidential debate season heats up, now is the perfect time for me to debate men’s’ suits. In men’s’ suits (unlike politics)  you basically have three choices: one button, two button, or three button, each having their pros and cons.

 

One button: Thanks to a recent resurgence in popularity, mostly attributed to the skinny suit, the one button is making a comeback. This suit really looks best on a man with a very athletic physique. Because of the precise location of the button, it is perfect for the man who isn’t afraid to let his muscles show.

Two button: The most classic, versatile, enduring, popular and easy to wear style. If you watched the debate last night, you would notice that both candidates wore the two button style. Vote for whomever you want, they both looked great in their two button suits.

Three button: Best suited for men who are taller than six feet because the buttons on the jacket reach higher up on the chest.  The three button suit can either be very stylish or very out of date and hardly anywhere in between so, keep up to date on mens’ fashion or you will run the risk of looking like you stepped out of an Austin Powers movie.

 

Whatever suit you choose, make sure you have it tailored so it will fit you and not the hanger it came on. Too-tight or too-baggy pants is a no-no, as is having saggy, sloping shoulders or a boxy waist. A great suit is nothing without a great fit!

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

How Much For That Dress In The Window?

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In the 20th century DeBeers introduced modern society to the idea that a woman’s engagement ring should cost approximately 2 month’s salary and no one seemed to blink an eye. The engagement ring will probably be worn every day for the rest of a woman’s life – barring no unfortunate circumstances.

By comparison, no one has ever come forward to say how much a  bridal gown should cost. What percentage of salary, wedding budget or any other indication of the amount of money one should spend. Of course the 2 months salary really was a genius marketing strategy and nothing more.

The best way to decide on how much to spend on your bridal gown is to first take a look at what’s important to you. First and foremost, determine your budget immediately. Before you open a bridal magazine, sit down with whomever is paying and have an honest conversation about price. Convey this to your bridal consultant when you enter the salon and it will help him or her determine what gowns you will be seeing.

After the budget is determined,  consider the  three F’s: Fabric, Fit and Finish.

Fabric:  The quality of the fabric will increase the price of the  gown greatly. Inspect the fabric… is it silk? Is it smooth  or does it have inconsistencies in the weave? High quality silk and low quality silk have one thing in common: they are both silk. However, the process they go through to become a garment is entirely different. The reason some fabrics are more expensive than others because they are more valuable. They are better in quality, they look better and they feel better. High quality fabric makes a difference in price. Does it feel good next to your skin or is the fabric itchy? A quality garment begins with quality fabric.

Fit: Each manufacturer has their own standard sizing. What does that mean? Not every size 8 fits the same way. Vera Wang’s size 8  maybe be cut slightly different from Monique Lhullier’s size 8. Also, a great fit for your body may not be a great fit for the bride standing next to you. The truth is that a  more expensive gown will have a better fit  because a lot of time has  been spent perfecting the pattern before it even becomes a gown. Maggie Sottero advertises her gowns as the best fit in the bridal industry. Is it true? Try one on and decide for yourself.

Finish: The quality of any garment is revealed in the finished product. The finish of a gown refers to the end stages of construction. My mother always told me that a garment should look as beautiful on the inside as on the outside. She was a smart lady. Look inside the gown: are the inside seams exposed? Are there any threads dangling out of seams? Is the hem even all the way around? The serged method is  the least expensive way of finishing seams. This is great for tank tops and denim. By comparison,  French seams are delicate and time consuming. Does this matter to you? A beautifully sewn garment will also be easier to alter and will look better as a result. The gown should feel smooth and comfortable against your body, nothing pinching or poking anywhere. The attention to detail is one of the most important factors in deciding how much your gown will cost.

A bargain is when you pay less for something than it is actually worth. Getting a beautiful gown of superior quality within your price range is a bargain. Buying ana garment for any price that is made and fits poorly is not a bargain.

When deciding on how much a gown is worth to you, remember that you will never be photographed in anything as much as you will be in your wedding gown and you will probably never be seen by as many people at one time as when you are wearing your wedding gown. Decide the value of that before your enter the first salon.

Remember, you always get what you pay for. 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

The Reality Of Wedding Costs

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If you ever wondered what determines the cost of weddings… wonder no more! Here are the answers, broken down in a way that is easy for anyone to understand.

For a wedding and reception with 150 guests

The cost of an extravagant wedding in Cook County, IL is $72,000

The cost of the average wedding in Cook County, IL is $33,000

The cost of a simple, pared down wedding in Cook County, IL is $22,000

Want to save some money and have your wedding in Naperville? The location won’t make that much of a difference, which is a big shock to me since I always thought that having a wedding in the city had to be more expensive than in the suburbs. Using several zip codes with varying demographics, the cost of any of these three weddings is within a thousand dollars of the average given the same number of guests and style of wedding.

What does that mean? An extravagant wedding in Schaumburg costs about as much as an extravagant wedding in Chicago or Lake Forest or Oak Park or Burr Ridge. You will have to travel more than 75 miles from the city for the location to make any noticeable difference in price.

What makes the biggest difference in the price? The extras; wedding planners, couture gowns and tuxedos, exceptional video, location photography, custom wedding rings, artistic cakes, extraordinary flowers, top notch musicians, anything that goes above and beyond. Oddly enough, one of the biggest factors that will affect your total cost is wedding favors!

Thanks (in part) to Pinterest, DIY wedding are very popular. But, that’s not going to save you nearly as much as you think. Why? Because the same flowers that a florist could provide for $6,000 will cost you nearly as much in materials alone and if you add your time ( if your time is as valuable as mine) you have spent nearly double the amount. You will never get the same discount or special rate as a professional florist and you will never be able to do the same arrangements for the same cost. The same formula goes for musicians, photographers, invitations, bakeries, bridal ensemble accessories and so on.

For the best DIY wedding, do only the simple things yourself; the add-ons, the small touches, table numbers, favors, etc. Tackling the big projects will leave you breathless and broke.

In the end, the only real way to save money is to have a smaller affair. Inviting 75 guests rather than 150 will allow you to spend more on the things that are important to you and less on the overall (per person) package.

If you have a few minutes and would like to play around with some numbers, here is a link to a simple, fun and fairly accurate wedding cost calculator that will  give you an idea of what to expect in your area.

 https://www.costofwedding.com/index.cfm/action/costest.index

-Penn Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago