Military Weddings – Pageantry and Patriotism

From the invitation etiquette to the ceremonial exit, Military weddings are fraught with tradition and rules. Some of the rules are guidelines and some are century old traditions not to be broken.

For the most part, military weddings are just like any other ceremony but there are moments, when even the most jaded wedding guests will be momentarily taken aback. One of these moments is the  “The Arch of the Sabres” or “Arch of Swords”. The  sword-bearers’ rank, title and participation in other parts of  the wedding vary depending upon the branch of service in which they are enlisted. The basics are that outside the cermony, six or eight uniformed soldiers hold their sabres (swords) in an arch formation over the couple as they exit the building. This is obviously a pared-down explanation of an extremely choreographed, rehearsed and important part of a military wedding. The end result is always the same, a beautiful military custom is performed.

Invitations can be of any style but must include military information of anyone whose name is included the invitation. This means that if the groom’s parents, bride’s parents, bride or groom are active or retired military their title and rank and branch of service are listed on the invitation in very specific order. This is very specific and there is no room for creativity in the wording or placement of words.

Wedding attire seems like an easy choice.  Just wear a dress uniform, right? Not so much. Every soldier, cadet and officer has  different uniforms for several different occasions. And as you may have already guessed –  there are very strict  rules as to which uniform to wear. It all depends upon the time of day, rank, branch of service and whether or not you are active or retired. One thing is for sure – a boutonniere is never pinned to a military uniform.

If the bride is an officer in active military duty, she may still wear a traditional wedding gown of her choice. Her affiliation can be expressed through decor, bridesmaid attire and flower choices. If the couple chooses, a flag may be displayed under proper conditions, exactly centered behind the receiving line.

The cutting of the cake is also performed using an undecorated  sabre or sword.  The bride takes the ‘sword’ and cuts the wedding cake, with the groom’s right hand resting over hers. To prevent damage to the blade it must be cleaned thoroughly before being returned to the scabbard.

Special attention must also be paid the seating chart. This is particularly important if high-ranking officers will be attending.  This is non-negotiable. The seating chart etiquette must be adhered to strictly.

Military weddings are non -religious ceremonies and can be performed by anyone licensed to do so. However, if a  military Chaplain is used, it  is required they be extended an invitation  to the reception. It is  not permitted for a military chaplain to charge for his or her service for the day. However, a  donation may be made to the Chaplain’s fund. 

There are ample amounts of reference material available for each branch of service and you can also consult with your  Chaplain or ask your senior officer to make recommendations.  

It is also important to note that  many vendors give discounts to active military and it is not in poor taste to ask. Considering the sacrifice many of our brave men and women make on a daily basis, it is an honor to serve them for a change.

To our friends near and abroad who serve our country, we salute you!