Weddings Are Not Casual Friday

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The other day my son asked me why men used to wear suits to baseball games. Isn’t it interesting that even a 9 yr old noticed that people don’t dress properly anymore?  There have been those occasions when I wear pajamas to drop my kids off at school in the morning, knowing I am not getting out of the car but, if my foot steps out onto the pavement you had better believe that I am fully dressed in a (somewhat) presentable fashion.  Which is why it is so odd to me that when I go to a wedding, I always see someone underdressed. In order to help you understand how to be the perfectly dressed guest at a wedding, I have put together some guidelines: 

Daytime Casual –  does not mean wear jeans and flip-flops. Wedding casual is different from ‘running to the grocery store’ casual. Wedding Casual means you could get by with a floral dress, sweater and skirt set, or even a sundress (weather permitting). For men open necked shirts with no tie are perfectly acceptable, in fact a nicer Hawaiian shirt for a beachfront venue is striking.  Men and women both need to take note of the location of the wedding – if it is beach or grass, make sure you are wearing shoes that can handle nature without aerating the soil or sinking into the sand. For evening casual just kick it up a notch -no need to break out your finest but, perhaps a touch of sparkle wouldn’t hurt, either. Always keep the setting in mind.

 Semi- Formal – Dress as if you were headed to the theater. A flirty cocktail dress and heels, or a dressy pantsuit. You want to be comfortable, able to move easily and to dance, of course. Avoid long dresses, it is too formal. For men- your suit  doesn’t have to be  black even though it is always a safe choice. You can also wear a blazer and slacks as long as you have a tie.

Black Tie Optional – this indicates that you can go  formal if you want, but you don’t have to. Women can wear a dress that is long or short, as long as it indicates elegance. Some beads and/or sequins are acceptable. Men can wear a tuxedo or a nice dark suit.

Black Tie – this is when you can bring out your finest and not feel over-dressed. If the invitation says Black Tie – its time to bring out the beads; beaded accessories,shoes,  sparkly earrings and perhaps a long silk wrap you have tucked away in a closet somewhere. Although in the past long dresses were required, it is acceptable to wear tea-length gowns but, avoid  short cocktail gowns. Dress as if you were invited to aPresidential Inaguration Ball or the Academy Awards!  For men it simple: Wear a tuxedo. Wear the tux with studs and bow tie and don’t forget to shine your patent leather shoes since no tuxedo is really a tuxedo without the right shoes.

 If the invitation does not specify what type of event it is, look for clues so you aren’t over or (God forbid) under-dressed. The venue, the type of invitation, the time of day will all give you insight into what you should be wearing. If all else fails, call the bride or groom (if you feel comfortable) or a close member of the wedding party.

The most important thing is to feel comfortable in your choice. If you can’t move, sit or eat one bite – you will be miserable not able to enjoy this lovely event!

For more great tips and ideas on weddings, be sure to get tickets to one of our bridal shows in your area. Call 847-428-3320 for complimentary tickets to show in  your area.

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago

 

 

Dressing Up Isn’t So Hard To Do

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I know it’s hard to believe but, people used to actually get dressed up….all the time. Men never left the house without a hat (not a baseball hat) and women always wore stockings and heels. Of course with that dress code came a plethora of problems like hat hair and girdles.

Today, it seems, people have trouble knowing how to dress to even go to the grocery store.  I see more flip-flops than I can count in the summer months. I see high school and college children wearing pajama pants to school and generally speaking - females are the worst offenders. Maybe it’s just me – but I have no interest in seeing anyone’s bra, underwear or jammies.

So in this day of casual wear how do you tell your wedding guests that jeans are not acceptable (even with a dinner jacket for men) and that you fully expect them to dress appropriately? It is not that hard, actually. The place to let your guests know what is expected of them is in the invitation. The following terms are perefectly acceptable on the invitation:

“Beach Attire”- If you are having a destination wedding on the beach, your female guests should wear a sundress, casual separates (cruise wear) and they CAN wear dressier flip flops or sandals. The beach is no place for stilettos. Men can get away with a nice shirt, maybe Tommy Bahama or a stylish DaVinci bowling shirt (think Charlie Sheen) with summer pants. I would still advise against jeans, it ruins the look of the super-cool shirt.

“Casual Weding Attire”is not jeans, flips flips, or tank tops. Think if it as a a job interview only with better accessories. A nice skirt and blouse with heels. Hosiery is optional in summer months but, wear a bra if you need one. No one needs to see your jiggly parts moving around on the dance floor. Whatever you do – don’t forget to check for VPL – visible panty lines. No need to break out the rhinestones and glitter, that’s equally inappropriate. Men can expect to wear nice slacks and a dressier button down or polo shirt with a sport coat – tie not necessary.

“Informal Wedding Attire” is a step up from casual. A nicer dress, made of nicer fabric – something you would wear to a college graduation or to meet the first lady. Think of the outfit Michelle Obama wore when she met the Qeen of England. Floor length is out. Men should wear a suit but still no need to wear a tie if the shirt is nice enough. For a preppy look try a navy blazer with Khaki pants and a pastel Foulard tie. Foulard is a woven fabric with a small, symmetrical print.

“Formal Wedding Attire” is dressy, what you would wear to the opera or a State Dinner. Cocktails dresses, long dresses and dressy evening separates. As always don’t forget to have the right undergarments. Men should wear a dark suit and tie, tuxedo not necessary.

“Black Tie” or Ultra Formal is defined as cocktail or long dresses for women and tuxedos for men. Break out the fine jewelry, sparkly accessories and beaded purse. Men do not have to wear a bow tie as long as they have a tuxedo or a fine suit with contrasting fabric on the lapels. Dress like you are headed for the red carpet at the Academy Awards.

If your guests do not have the good sense  to know the definition of Casual Wedding attire, how do enforce the dress code? That is entirely up to you. You could either have security to make sure everyone is  up to par and those who aren’t are turned away or you let it go and tell the photographer not to take photos of anyone dressed inappropriately. If you have a website, this would be a good place to further explain your expectations to your guests.

Lets face it – you can’t legislate good taste. With any luck at all, you could have someone dressed so oddly that it will entertain you for years to come. 

-Penny Frulla for Bridal Expo Chicago